I'm A Hoarder!

Disclaimer: This is NOT our house!!

We recently placed our house on the market. I could probably list a lot of reasons we decided to do it. Among them would be the need to move closer to my family, the desire to move to a more rural area, the love we have for Pike County, AR, the life changes we've gone through over the past two years. 

It is a fact that our goal is to move to Glenwood. We do love it there. It's quieter. I'll be able to work from home. There are five lakes and three rivers within a half-hour drive. Our alma mater (Henderson State) is also a half-hour away (we have fond memories of HSU and our college youth ministry, MBSF).

But the goal of moving to Glenwood is really secondary. Our primary goal was to be able to go where God sent us so we could serve there. It seemed like a very simple goal, right?

We found out different. It took us months to prepare our house for listing. First, there was painting, landscaping and weeding that had to be done on the outside. The same had to happen on the inside as well. We found out quickly that the inside was by far the most difficult part. It seemed the more we dug out of closets and corners and from under beds, the more there was to dig out. We ended up renting storage both in Cabot and in Glenwood. The Glenwood storage would hold things we needed but not in Cabot. The Cabot storage held things we might possibly need quickly. 

But a great deal of what we dug out didn't go to storage. It went into the garbage or to Goodwill. We discovered we had been hoarding a lot of things we would never use. We even found unused checks from the 1990s!! Our shredder was running 24x7 for awhile. We also found a lot of old photos from college or earlier, so we sat around with the girls and laughed and told stories to go with our photos. 

Eventually, the house began to look like it was ready for listing. The clutter in the rooms was gone. Lauren could actually get into her closet again and Lacey's toys all had a place again. In fact, the house actually felt more comfortable. It was as if there was added stress sitting in the house with us in the form of clutter and junk, and when we removed it all the stress just left! It also became much easier to actually put the house on the market.

Another discovery during this endeavor was that there was more clutter we had to get rid of. In order for us to truly be ready for God to lead us, we needed to rid ourselves of everything that was preventing us from picking up and moving. So there was a spiritual element that had to be dealt with. We began to realize we were also engaged in spiritual hoarding. There was a lot of spiritual clutter and junk we needed to clear out. And the things we were hoarding were different for Dana than for me. Nevertheless, there were things that we were refusing to rid ourselves of. Things that were cluttering up our hearts and causing us needless emotional and spiritual stress.

Some may not understand the stress of searching for a church home. Maybe it's easier for some to do than others. But that's just the thing isn't it? Some people struggle spiritually for completely different reasons than others. 

We found this spiritual clutter was also impeding our ability to step out on faith and do what we had been given to do. Just like hoarding can bring about a deep depression and withdrawal from society, spiritual hoarding can overwhelm us, depress us, and cause us to withdraw spiritually, effectively rendering us spiritually impotent. 

What did we do? We began to pray more specifically about our needs and goals. First we prayed about finding a church home. I have to confess that, for me, finding our new church was a burden lifted. There was also the problem of finding a place in Glenwood. Did we want to buy or build? If we did build, were we going to have to start construction in the middle of the winter? These are things we talked and prayed about. And, since we're human, we don't always keep these things at bay. So when they come back to burden us we just have to keep turning them over to God. 

So are we fully prepared to pick up and go wherever God leads? Well, probably not most of the time. However, there is a sense of accomplishment after having prepared a house for listing. And a sense of preparedness when you begin to overcome the spiritual obstacles. These combined make it much easier to say "I'm ready God!" and to truly have faith that He is going to open (and close) all the right doors for us!

Will we end up in Glenwood? Not if the Lord points us somewhere else! As I said, it's a secondary goal. The primary goal is to set ourselves in the middle of God's will.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of faith. - Hebrews 12:1,2 (NIV)

Step Aside

We all know the story of Jonah, right? God said, "Do this." Jonah said, "No." God disciplined Jonah and again said, "Do this." Then Jonah complied.

We use this Biblical account to teach our children about obedience. We use it to teach our adults about discipline.

It really is a great story of God's grace and mercy and how God teaches us that, not only do we not need to know the whole story, we shouldn't be overly concerned with the end result of our efforts.

We do spend a lot of time considering this account and what it teaches us. But what if I told you God is not always so gracious and merciful?

Our Bible study for last Sunday was on Joshua. Specifically, it was about God passing the mantle of leadership to Joshua. It was from there that we began to discuss how easy it is to obey/disobey God and how God dealt with that disobedience.

In the context of this account of Joshua and Israel, the Israelites had seen God's hand in their delivery from bondage. Yet despite God's repeated miracles it was no time before they were complaining to Moses that he should have left them in Egypt. Furthermore, once they spied out the promised land, all but two of the spies said the people were too strong for them to take the land. The Israelites had so quickly forgotten exactly who had gotten them to this point. However, Joshua and Caleb had not. They knew it was not them who would take the land but God would, through them.

What did God do when the Israelites refused to take the land? He didn't discipline them did he? This is what God said in Numbers 14 (NIV):

"Not one of you will enter the land I swore with uplifted hand to make your home, except Caleb son of Jephunneh and Joshua son of Nun. As for your children that you said would be taken as plunder, I will bring them in to enjoy the land you have rejected. But as for you, your bodies will fall in this wilderness. Your children will be shepherds here for forty years, suffering for your unfaithfulness, until the last of your bodies lies in the wilderness. For forty years—one year for each of the forty days you explored the land—you will suffer for your sins and know what it is like to have me against you.’ I, the Lord, have spoken, and I will surely do these things to this whole wicked community, which has banded together against me. They will meet their end in this wilderness; here they will die."

God cursed the Israelite adults (20 years old or older) to die in the wilderness. He used them to raise their children so that their children would take their place and inherit the land He had promised to them. Essentially God told the Israelites to "Step aside and let someone else inherit your promise". He didn't spend any time trying to discipline them or rehabilitate them. He move on without them.

If we are going to teach our children lessons about God's grace and mercy we should be just as willing to teach them (and remind ourselves) about God's judgement. If we aren't willing to do what God asks us to do He is more than willing to find someone else who is willing.

Look at it this way. God didn't put aside one person who disobeyed. He put aside an entire generation who disobeyed! He told them they would not inherit His promise because they had disobeyed. These were God's chosen people! He had gone to what appears (to us) to be a great deal of trouble to get  them out of Egypt and into their own land.

This reminds me of a statement Bill Cosby once made about his childhood:

"From the age of seven my father established our relationship.  He said, 'I brought you into this world an I can take you out.  And it don't make no difference to me because I'll make another one who looks just like you'."

God loves us and He wants the best for us. But don't be deceived... He will not allow our disobedience to interfere with what He has planned to do. He will accomplish His will with or without us. Wouldn't you much rather be on the field than on the sideline?

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. - Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

This is God

God is not a trend or a fashion.
He is not a hashtag or a tweet.
He is the creator of all things.
He is omnipotent, omniscient and everlasting.
To Him, sin is still sin and righteousness is still righteousness,
The wages of sin is still death and His gift is still life eternal.
His truths do not shift with public opinion polls. He does not require a majority vote.
God does not change. He is above all and over all.
He does not expect us to know his thoughts or motivations. He only asks us to seek Him.
He is sovereign, yet He gives us the right to choose whether to follow Him.
He is holy and just, yet he shows mercy and freely offers grace.
He has no need of anything, yet He desires a relationship with you.
This is God...

Isiah 41:13 - For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.

The GRACE of Life!

Today's Sunday School lesson was on marriage. Well, sort of. I guess it was more about the relationships between a man and a woman, from first sight to and through marriage. The lesson started in 1 Corinthians 7 with Paul's response to a question the church at Corinth had written him to ask. Paul's response was "it is not good for a man to touch a woman."  Did he really say that? Yup, he did! He also said some things about divorce and remarriage but I don't want to get into that.

The fact is, if you read Paul's comments within their proper context the are very beneficial to a marriage and not only to a marriage but to someone seeking to find God's will for their life where it applies to marriage and relationships.

One thing Paul doesn't discuss here is dating. Of course people didn't date back then, did they? So we have to take his comments and make them fit into today's culture, right? I have to say wrong. We must remove ourselves from culture and find what is God's will for our life. God doesn't care what our culture is. He doesn't care if others are playing the field, sewing their oats, letting off steam or whatever. He cares if we are doing His will, and that's exactly what we should care about.

Dana and I watched a movie last night named Sara's Choice starring Rebecca St. James. It was really a great movie and well thought out. In the movie Sara (St. James) is a businesswoman who's just been promoted and finds out she is pregnant. Unmarried and afraid she will lose her promotion, she struggles between her religious upbringing that tells her she must keep the baby and her coworker trying to convince her to have an abortion. At one point in the movie she sits down with her pastor, a man who watched her grow up. She tells him she has a decision to make but doesn't tell him what the problem is. He asks her questions about both decisions and, based on her answers, then tells her she knows what the right one is.  Finally he tells her she has to make the right decision regardless of the consequences.

That really slapped me in the face. So often in my life I have made decisions based on what others might think or what I think might make me happy at the time. I have often tried to justify the decision as the "right" one, but in reality the right decision was already clear to me.

I dated in high school and in college. But, looking back, I don't believe that was what God wanted me to do. Why did I do it? Because I was focused on what others thought of me and what I wanted to do, not what God wanted me to be doing. I was driven by a lifestyle that the culture said was normal. And there were consequences.

Paul said it is better for some to marry rather than burn with passion. He said it would be great if everyone could be as he was (not driven by the need for a life partner) but he understands that isn't the case, so he said a man who is driven in the way should find a wife. Paul makes it clear to us that some need to be married. But he also says that some don't have to be... and that's a bonus because they can more readily serve the Lord!

Those of us who are married are married. We have made a choice. There will be consequences. But remember this; all life choices have consequences! Going down one road means I don't go down the other one. Your marriage won't be perfect because neither you nor your spouse are perfect.

Likewise, if you are single and have no prospects, don't feel you're doing something wrong. Don't spend every waking hour trying to find a spouse. Spend time seeking God's will for you and then do His will. You already have most of His will written down for you. The rest will come to you if you stay focused on Him!

If you are married and you are struggling with your marriage, God has given you the answers you need in His word. Look at 1 Peter 3. Read it all, not just the parts today's culture says are anti-women. Get the proper context. Realize that Love in marriage is a verb! Love is what we do more than it is what we feel!

Peter says, in verse 7, that husbands should dwell with their wives "with understanding". Please note that this doesn't mean we know and understand all about our wives. This means that we understand they are different from us and we must bear that in mind in everything we do. Yes, he calls her the "weaker vessel". It's true! Have you tried arm wrestling your wife? Husbands are to protect, defend, love and cherish their wives!

Then he says that a husband and wife are "heirs together of the grace of life"!  WOW!! I've always heard that life is a gift from God. However, I've never really considered this gift as a gift of Grace. Grace is getting something you don't deserve. Life is something we don't deserve! We don't deserve it! But God has given it to us anyway. And not only that, He has given those of us who need it helpers to be partakers of that gift of grace with us till we die. Till death do us part!

1 Peter 3:7 - Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.

The Reason For My Blog

  When I created this blog my intent was to help parents realize their responsibility in rearing their children. It was also to help them realize their responsibility in rearing their children "in the nurture and admonition of the Lord". These were the two primary goals I had in this blog, and each of my posts has tried to convey some biblical truth to the reader in an attempt to show them that scripture is by far the best guide in raising a child. I wanted the parent to understand how important consistency is to a child. A child who continually receives mixed signals from his parent will never know just what his parent wants him to do.  Think about it.

It is your responsibility to raise your child. It is not the church. It is not the government, the school, the community or the grandparents' responsibility. The responsibility for your child is yours and yours alone! Moreover, it is your responsibility to raise your child according to the guidelines set forth in scripture.

Not to be judgmental, but factual... there is coming a day when every parent who has ever lived will be held accountable for the way they raised their children (among many other things). When this happens, the judge will not be looking to see that we took them to soccer, basketball, football or softball practice or if we made sure they had the best education we could afford. The judge will determine whether we raised that child up to follow after Christ.

Last month (May 2013) our pastor delivered a sermon titled "Parenting Was Supposed To Be Fun". In his message he stated "..a good start toward what they will be is infinitely more important than a good start toward what they will do". Education, athletics, dance, gymnastics, cheer-leading and social status are irrelevant. Raising a child who fears, loves and follows God is what matters.

If you are a parent you need to listen to Bro. Brent's sermon! Click on the link above. It's about 45 minutes. Turn off the television, put away (not down... AWAY) the phone and listen to this sermon. While you're listening, open up Notepad or some other editor and take notes!! Then, print your notes and put them somewhere that you can see them daily.

We need to change our priorities when it comes to parenting. Our children don't need the money, the things, the activities... they need us! Bro. Brent makes the statement in his message that "the most formative years of any child are before the age of five". That means that a child raised in daycare until kindergarten will receive the majority of his training during his formative years from his experiences in daycare. Do you want your child to have the best influence in his formative years? Then you need to provide it. Why? Because this is the way God intended it.

Am I saying that no child should be in daycare? No, not at all. Some parents find themselves in the situation, one that is more and more common, where they are single parents. They can't be home with their child and earn the money to keep a roof over that child's head. I understand that and I can't imagine what that must be like. However, many Christian families have decided that both parents should work and someone else should raise their child. If you are one of those parents you need to listen to this message! It was meant for you!

Here is the link again.

3 John 1:4 - "I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth."